I’ve dissected frogs, 

cats, fetal pigs and human 

cadavers —so I was told, 

“People learn this way” 

by deconstruction, by taking apart

a curiosity to peek inside 

scramble the eggs  

pick a flower, throw a rock  

and that’s how people learn

I’ve dissected hallucinations, 

bizarre voices, disarticulate 

psychoses and human delusions

—so I was told, “People heal this way”

by cutting their shame open

and smashing the guilt crumbs 

to analyze, synthesize, 

decompartmentalize 

examining by redundant pecking

and that’s how people get better 

Psychiatrists, psychologists, 

and amateur psychics 

in between every pill 

every grounding meditation 

and friends thinking they know  

the anatomy of a breakdown

And even religions suspect

dunking me under their baptismal water

but my disorder wasn’t drowned

it can’t be dipped like cookies in milk

or sprayed like doused weeds

Then oil anointing

church elders branding my forehead

with their slippery thumbs

praying, chanting

and speaking in tongues

That didn’t cure or delete

and it didn’t dismember the right organs

and anyway,

    I’ve dissected thumbs