“Jacaranda”

Jae Eason

Artist Statement: My work relates to the commitments in decomp journal's mission statement in that it is the reflection of my world and how I choose to live in it. My work expresses how I am able to exist in this world, not only as a black woman, but a queer black woman. How the promises given to many, sometimes miss me.

Canarsie’s night sky drapes over us. The sweetness

of summer wisps in

& out of my car. We are parked

in front of her house (actually, a bit further down

so her mom won’t see), and I’m not ready to say

goodbye. The tail lights in front of us refract

off her face like moonlight. / Illuminate / her cupid’s

bow. I’m hoping she is as nervous

as I am

& wants this as badly as I do. This is our gay,

black version of The Kiss. & I’ve never felt so

intimate with some who has never been inside

me. Our eyes navigate to each other. Map

together all the pieces of us that have fallen

into wreckage.

We silently agree that we are ready; that we want

this.

My fingers / hold steadily / to her cheek.

Afraid that if I / let go / she will dissolve into the

seat beside me.

Her hand rests on my neck,

and I wonder if she’s afraid of the same / fate /.

When the tension melds into lust, & we

kiss,

it feels like rewind. Slow,

steady,

/ remembering / why the beginning

is / always / the best part. She feels like the

thing I’ve been ______. I don’t want to open my

eyes, have this moment become the past.

So our lips continue to meet in the center console,

& we kiss.

& kiss

&—

 

Jae Eason is a poet from Long Island, New York. They studied English Literature at Arizona State University. While there, they won a Swarthout Award in Poetry. They currently work as an Office Manager at Brooklyn Poets and an English Teacher in South Korea. If they are not up to all the normal things people usually do, they’re most likely having an existential crisis.