is what my dad said to me on the couch a month ago / the same couch where i told him a year before / that i was pillaged wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants / by a friend / in my bed / i guess he forgot / most people do when they are accustomed to taking / bodies 

you’re gonna get raped if you keep dressing like that / like when i leave the house after sleeping through two days / sweatshirt on / sleep crust thick / where the man and his friend lean out of the car window at 6 am to whoop at me / and my swollen eyes 

you’re gonna get raped if you keep dressing like that / like at the cvs at 2am / where in a glazed depression i buy twenty dollars worth of food i am allergic to / make my body as undesirable as i feel / and even then / in a hived state / a man whistles at me / oreo crumbs on my ballooned lips 

dress more like a lady / and maybe then your ass won’t be grabbed at a music festival in september / waiting in line for sunglasses / dress more like a lady / and maybe then the old man at the coffee shop you work at won’t lean in his chair when you clear tables 

in the middle of july in a hoodie and sweats / me, my mom, and three officers stood on my grandmas porch / one asked if i was wearing a bra while the other two knocked down the door / she had tried to kill herself / again 

dress more like a lady / like something that should be desired to be fucked / not asked to / bc that’s what i am doing, right? / embarrassing you in front of all the bills and mikes and dans / the men who you want to say my how pretty she got / not / how much is she charging? with a wink and elbow jab / beer rings on the table / it is the same though, isn’t it? / just different ways of saying / i like your daughters tits 

you’re embarrassing me, rachel / really means / be quieter when you’re hunted / really means / don’t ornate the thing we already own / really means / your body is just a rental / you can’t paint the walls